ColdFusion Muse

I Feel Pretty and Witty and Bright

Mark Kruger December 10, 2007 2:33 PM Humor and Life Comments (1)

I just got a spam message advertising a beauty product. In the subject line it said, "You are a Beautiful Woman". It went on to tell me how I am wonderful and beautiful - and I don't hear it a enough (after which it tried to sell me something for my wrinkly, saggy skin). It's true I don't hear it enough. In fact, I don't hear it at all - at least not to my face. I admit there are occasions when I feel pretty and want to listen to Bette Midler or watch a musical... but they are really pretty rare. I have enough problems in my life without my inbox adding gender confusion. Isn't it enough that they think I'm bald, fat, under-financed, impotent, and have a very small ....er...uh... television? Do they have to criticize my makeup as well? I remember that old prayer, "Lord, help me be the man my dog thinks I am." I would add to that, "...and never let me be the man (or woman) my email thinks I am."

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  • rish's Gravatar
    Posted By
    rish | 12/10/07 2:47 PM
    Midler and musicals - seek help, Mark, seek help now!